The Trenchies

Its natural to feel creeped out when you see a large group of people all wearing black trench coats.

I refer to this crowd as "the trenchies."

What is the purpose of a trench coat?

Unless it is raining, you are an active member of the mafia, you are a superhero that needs to quick change at every slight incantation of danger, or you are planning on flashing a crowd at a girls soccer game, I advise you leave them at home.

I mean, think of all the things a person could hide in those things.

These may include, but are not limited to:
A bomb
A large caliber machine gun
Several ninja stars of various sizes
A vile of H1N1
A small animal
A baby
A sandwich
A baby sandwich
A couple of water ballons filled with cottage cheese perfect for throwing at cars in traffic
Or worst, absolutely nothing.The list goes on, use your imagination.

Actually, thinking of things one can hide in a trench coat is entertaining. You should try it next time you find yourself in a long line or in a physics class.

Apparently trenchies enjoy the fine dining of Rush's. Maybe it's the milkshakes. For whatever reason, I have found thats where they like to hang out late at night.

I was recently eating there with some friends after we saw New Moon. Yes, I did see New Moon. Judge me if you will, but odds are you probably saw it too. Or are thinking very seriously about secretly renting it when it comes out. Or maybe I'm just trying to feel better about myself for seeing it twice.

Anyway, I was eating my bacon cheese burger when I spotted trenchie number one. Black trench, greased back hair, slightly bent forward, hands in pocket.

Stereotypical trenchie.

Trenchie number 1 was followed closely by trenchie 2, 3, and 4.

Trenchie 5 and 6 came in about ten minutes later.

As the trenchies paraded in, me and my friends scooted closer together. My heart beat a little faster. I think we were all suprised that trenchies would go to a place where a happy fat chief holding a burger welcomes you to eat.

I watched them all order, how they acted with the cashiers, and with each other. They acted strangely....normal. They left Rush's at the same time we did, so of course we walked pretty fast to the car and locked the doors laughing and breathing signs of relief that whatever was inside their trench coats hadn't been exposed to us. We watched them as they walked across the parking lot towards books-a-million.
Which happened to be closed, so I'm unsure of their motives in that perspective.

But as I look back on this, I realize that we were the ones creeping on them, not the other way around. We had creeped on the creepers. Oh the irony!

Maybe the trenchies are just misunderstood.

The world may never know.